Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Myths, Cures, and Remedies

(This is what we have learned in our years living in Mexico. Enjoy!)

1. If you bump your head, mix a bit of saliva and sugar together and wipe it on that spot. This will make the goose egg disappear. 

2. If you are pregnant, when there is a full moon, you MUST wear something with red on it. A red ribbon, a red belt...something! If you don't the moon will 'eat your baby' and/or the baby will have a cleft palate.

3. If you don't tell anyone you are pregnant, you won't show, but as soon as you announce it, out comes the baby bump! (Does this mean if you don't tell anyone for 9 months, you'll have a very tiny kid?)

4. If you eat green veggies then get super angry, the greens will have an adverse affect on your body. They will turn into rocks and will have to be surgically removed.

5. For a bloody nose: Wipe forehead with a cool cloth, in an upward motion.

6. If your child won't stop crying, wipe a strip of saliva up and down his spine then jerk the skin up. This should calm him. 

7. When your kid swallows something he shouldn't (gum, cardboard, dirt, etc.) give him 2 tablespoons of cooking oil, hold him upside down by his feet, shake shake shake, and he will be fine.

8. If your kid won't eat, again...2 tablespoons of oil and pulling up on the skin by the spine will do the trick.

9. To cure a goose egg, rub it as soon and as hard as possible.

10. Don't eat watermelon and drink beer at the same time or you'll die. 

11. If you take medication with Coca Cola, you will get high.

12. If your food falls off your fork it means someone was looking at it and wanted it.

13. If you do not baptize your newborn into the Catholic church, it will grow horns.

14. Don't wipe the slobber off your baby's face or she will get indigestion.

15. To whiten teeth: Burn a tortilla until it is black, crumble it, then rub it into your teeth. Wash it off, brush your teeth like normal and...Voila!! You've got yourself some pearly whites!

16. If you are pregnant and do not eat what you crave, your baby will die.

17. If someone sweeps over your feet with a broom you will marry a widow.

18. Hang scissors in an open position over your doorway to keep witches from entering your house - they like to steal babies.

19. Having your baby blessed by a priest at birth or soon after, helps to calm their personality (too much crying means they are demon possessed).

20. If you are pregnant and want to have a boy, you must walk on your hands to your nearest cathedral wearing a pink dress with lime green frogs on it, balancing a lit candle of the bottoms of each of your feet. (I'm kidding...I just needed a #20).

We hope you have learned a lot, or at least have been entertained for the past couple minutes.
And if ever you have a medical question...just ask...I'm sure we have cheap cure for it!



Couture by Cassia said...

They r so superstitious at times it's so sad!!:( but these are hilarious lol I'm gonna advise them to others!:-p

Adrienne Garcia said...

These are so true! lol, my extended family teaches a lot of these things to their kids. I especially remember growing up with this one "If your food falls off your fork it means someone was looking at it and wanted it."

Tiffany Bracken: said...

Actually, the only one that has real relevance is the one about the bleeding nose. The cool cloth and rubbing motion causes your blood vessels to constrict, hence, stopping the bleeding. My fav for Taiwan? If you drink coffee when you are pregnant, you baby will have dark skin!

All that Jazz said...

Hee hee (I know you don't know me but....) these really made me laugh! I am Mexican, and I have family in Meheeco. I've heard many of these. They really cracked me up. Lord bless yall! (btw, I just randomly came across your site, I think off of Brittany Copelands.) Have a nice day!

The Wakefields: Missionaries to Mexico said...

Sis. Tiffany: That's funny! I'm sure you have plenty of your own "remedies". That coffee one is hilarious. :D

All That Jazz: WOW!! You say Meheeco!!!! US TOO!
That's soooo cool :p


Lauren Nicole said...

Ahahahahahahaha!!! You guys... These are so funny!! I mean, it's sad that they actually believe this stuff but nevertheless, absolutely hysterical!! Esp. Number 20... I can come up with some pretty crazy stuff but how one earth did you come up with that?!?! Oh my! That is too funny!

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